Musicians as Authors: AKA Performance isn’t everything

This will be one of the most controversial posts I’ll make on this page, but it’s an argument that needs to be made. But before I do that, I have a confession to make: I hate going to concerts.

I’ve been uncomfortable in nearly every concert I’ve ever been to. Whether it’s when an all white audience moves their hands in the air, like a scene in 8 Mile. The constant standing, the one drunk dude who tries to fight you if you bump into him, and of course that particular annoyance of idol worship. Where the musician is Holier than thou, and every thing that they say whips the crowd into this amorous frenzy. Even though the object of their desire are at best 10 yards away from you.

Everybody always seems more into the particular artist than I do. Everybody dresses to the nines in weird little get ups for that particular artist, for that particular scene, and you never know whether they do it for appearance or to express some sincere form of fandom. It’s a social event for an individualistic experience, that being, your musical preferences.

Yet it’s weird that music seems to be built around this foundation of expression. Imagine if novels never existed. That in order to to make any work of fiction you had to make a play, act in it, and then be judged on how charismatic you were on stage. Imagine all the great novelists Tolstoy, Dostoevsky, Hemingway, Dickens, Lovecraft, etc. If all of their art was considered moot all because they didn’t have a stage presence? That’s idiotic right?

But music is TRADITIONALLY a social event. You had to form a band, get many different people to play many different instruments, you had to actually play live to be heard, you had to tour to promote your album–you get the picture.

Yet times have changed. I literally have an entire electronic orchestra at my fingertips, I don’t need to get other people involved if I don’t want to, in other words I am in a way an author of sonic soundscapes. Which is why when Deadmau5 says all DJs just press play and every single journalist, musical purist, armchair rockstar, all got in arms–seems to me to be completely idiotic.

Say for a moment that was the case, how does that invalidate the art form? He made all of the music, even though he couldn’t physically play it. It would be like somebody reading a book and saying that it was terrible because the author couldn’t build a set to it. It doesn’t make sense. Not only does it not make sense but it also stifles the creativity of an artist.

Now obviously there are cases when a band’s live show does spectacularly well. Where you have to go to see them live just to feel the energy of the crowd, see the amazing special effects and stage props, feel the bass thumping deep in your chest, meet some cool and interesting people. I will begrudgingly admit that to be one of the major benefits to going to a live concert.

Yet at the same time when a show doesn’t have a live show, doesn’t perform, and you only judge them by their music–it can be, for me at least, a much more rewarding experience. You use your own imagination, picture your own fantastical world to explore in, and that’s why for me live concerts always leave something more to be desired. Because let’s face it, the book is almost always better than the movie.

So when I hear up and coming artists struggle with stage fright, have terrible stage presence, and aren’t social butterflies–I always want to tell them that it doesn’t have to be this way. But because in our cultural imagination we have it ingrained that not only must an artist, write, compose, sing, but also perform. Which speaks volumes to the amount of talent to the artists who can do all of these things. Yet at the same time artists should not beat themselves up, if they fail to perform.

We as musicians take so much for granted, we literally can achieve studio quality music from the sanctity of our bedrooms, we don’t have to have record label executives telling us how an album should sound, we don’t have to tour across country to promote our new material, we have complete creative control. And yet we will beat ourselves up for having so much freedom.

So if you are a struggling musician trying to make it big, there are many different avenues for many different types of people. If you don’t have to perform, you don’t have to. If you would rather perform, then by all means go. Yet it has to be known that there are more ways than one to become a successful musician.

Don’t Be Afraid of the Cringe

HOLLYWOOD, CA – NOVEMBER 12: Tommy Wiseau attends the screening of “The Disaster Artist” at AFI FEST 2017 Presented By Audi at TCL Chinese Theatre on November 12, 2017 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Neilson Barnard/Getty Images)

Whenever I tell people I made an album (which isn’t often) I always get the same response. First they quickly acknowledge that it’s cool that I released an album. Then second, they always say that they used to make music, but they would never make an album unless everything was perfect.

Now you’ll notice that I said, “People.” This isn’t a one time phenomena. And it always struck me as odd that multiple people have said the exact same thing. As General Patton said, “If everybody is thinking the same thing, then somebody isn’t thinking.”

Then there’s the actual music producer community. If you go on any music production forum, there’s always the one guy who is a know it all. Yet if you listen to their music it’s always so bland. I remember one guy who spent $800 on a new synthesizer, made one song on it, and never used it ever again–lecture me on the microphone that I was using, since it wasn’t in industry standards. Let me repeat that INDUSTRY STANDARDS. As though we were real life music producers.

Yet I see the same pattern emerge over and over again. When people aren’t shilling out T-shirts, buying thousands of dollars worth of equipment, or not making music because they’re a “Perfectionist;” they’re trying to live in this make believe world like they’re apart of the music industry. Which they’re not. I’m not. You’re not. None of us are. Like I’ve said we’re in the underground. Whether we like it or not.

Yet there is something existentially terrifying about being in the underground. It’s a certain type of fear. It’s the fear of the cringe.

Nobody likes to be mocked, nobody likes to be made fun of, and nobody wants their art–that they’ve poured their everything into–to be cringey. In fact I am willing to bet, if you were to ask most artists whether they would be mediocre, or cringey. Without a doubt they would chose mediocrity.

It’s why there’s so much of an emphasis on imagery in the underground scene. Where people become their own corporate brand, where they measure twitter followers, and soundcloud plays like a stockbroker following the stock market. I’m guilty of it. You’re guilty of it. We’re all guilty of it.

Yet it’s not to measure success. Nobody is really making bread. I mean, there’s always the potential to make millions. But what do you hear more of: the amount of followers, likes, listens, comments, retweets, and shares their music has? Or how much money they’ve made since making music?

So why do we do it? Why do we keep up with social media? Why do we care so much about arbitrary numbers? Why do we care about industry standards? Why does everything just “Have to be perfect?” I’ll tell you why. It’s all about validation.

You see why scares people the most when they see a Tommy Wiseau, a Chris Chan, or any other cringe phenomena–is that maybe they’re like that too. We all have cringey moments. We all have flaws. Yet what makes people so cringey is the lack of self awareness of those flaws, and when push comes to shove they will always double down in the cringe.

Yet the same characteristics can be seen in any great artist. So what separates a Marlon Brando, from a Tommy Wiseau? Why was Marlon Brando so easily able to express himself fully in a way that was palatable to the masses, while Tommy Wiseau was unable to?

And the answer is simple: one wanted to be an actor, and the other wanted to be an actor. You can always tell when an artist HAS something to say. With that desire, that vision–that ember that’s burning deep inside of them–you can always spot them. There isn’t any seeking any validation from them. It’s not because they’re so aloof that they don’t care. It’s that they don’t give power over to other people. And really that’s the crux of the issue.

Was the reason you decided to make music was to be liked by people? To have people pat you on the head and tell you how much of a good boy you are? Or did you make music so that you can express something that you’ve felt? To make something that’s your own, that’s special to you, and you alone.

Or better yet, here’s a test for you. If nobody listened to your music, would you still make music?

Because no matter what, even if Marlon Brando never made it big, and would only be in the local theater he would still be an actor. Tommy Wiseau if he didn’t have 6 million dollars from selling Korean leather jackets (?) then he wouldn’t have been an actor.

No matter what I know I’m going to create. I’ve failed far too many times, took far too many risks, and I am either the dumbest/most stubborn person alive to keep on creating. Yet I have to do it. The question is, who do I give power to myself? Or to other people?

So when you make a song, or do any other creative endeavor–you should have nothing to fear. Because if you remain true to yourself, and make art that is yours, and yours alone. Then nobody can take that power away from you. And that my friends is how you avoid the cringe.

Musicians Need to Respect Their Listeners and Add an Easy Mode

Hello old saw of new original music, not nice to see you again. How many times have I encountered new original music, that’s challenged my expectations, and changed my perspective of music. I’ll be honest it hasn’t been a pleasant experience.

Now don’t get me wrong, I really love me some Demi Lovato. But the problem with underground music is that unless somebody wants to listen to The Velvet Underground 100 times, it isn’t a rewarding experience to listen to new challenging music. Most people just don’t have the time to listen to new music, and as a result music has become an elitist insular community, when it should be more accepting and accommodating.

Ideally an easy mode would include 3-4 notes, 4/4 time signature, 3-4 instruments, and maybe vocals. Which is by far more accommodating to the general music listening populace, than most music on the radio. And this is what I’ll never understand about music fanboys and their continual, aggressive insistence that the mere presence of an easy mode would somehow compromise a special experience. It’s worth saying, time and time again: an easy mode does not have to change the core experience in any way, at all, period. Listening a version of Joy Division’s Unknown Pleasures that had an easy mode would, theoretically, be completely identical to listening Joy Division’s Unknown Pleasures now. The continued insistence that an easy mode would somehow affect the normal mode seems to represent a listener’s lack of respect for themselves, an idea that they would not be able to listen to the music that they want without ruining it for themselves.

There’s a lot of talk about “respecting the listener” when it comes to not including an easy mode, an idea that all music listeners should listen to the song the way the artist intended. And yet I think the lack of an easy mode showcases the exact opposite. It shows an almost stunning lack of respect for music listeners with the idea that they cannot be trusted with their own music listening experience, that even those who want a challenging songwould somehow be lured by the siren song of lower difficulties and destroy their own experience because they’re too impatient or immature to know what they actually want. The Genius youtube video series is a perfect example of this: I never used it once while listening to Bruno Mars, because I knew what experience I wanted. I didn’t get as into Lady Gaga, and so I used it liberally.

I don’t say this because I have bad taste in music. I say this because the music community has a responsibility–no, an obligation–to make music more accessible to the listener. After all how can deaf people share in the experience of listening to the latest Taylor Swift song? There’s an entire segment of the American Population that can’t even into music because they can’t hear it, and that’s just not right.

I mean, it’s not like I have this belief because I am an idiot and can’t into music. No I have this belief because I am morally superior to you. I am an ubermensch fighting on behalf of those who never asked me to fight for them. And really isn’t that why we all became journalists?

The Life Cycle of a Rockstar

There seems to be a cycle going on in the world of music. Kind of like the cycle of life, except this one is a bit weirder. It goes something like this first they’re a loser, then they’re the scrappy underdog, then they become rockstars, then addicts, then sober, and then a group of old guys doing a reunion show every now and then–because why not?

Now the issue with this is that nobodies lives are like this at all. Rock, hip hop, pop music, EDM, indie, whatever. Nobodies lives play out that old and played out stereotype that is the successful musician. The closest we get to representation of our lives is when the musician is at, what I call the loser phase.

The loser phase as it plays out in popular music, is that period when you’re just starting out being an adult. Friends come and go, you find out how much paying the bills really suck, you have an asshole boss, you hate your job, you go on date after date trying to find “The one.” Music works well with these tropes, because it’s the only stage of normal adulthood that musicians often find themselves in. It’s why whenever you hear a successful musician sprout off about politics, they sound less like a wise elder, and more like the kid who is a poli-sci major. It’s also why, nearly every successful musician is stuck at perennial adolescence. Or the “Fuck you Dad!” period of their lives. After all there are extremely rare cases where some musicians day job before they were famous had an supervisor or managerial role. Where they could no longer say, “Fuck Authority,” because they became the “Authority.”

That change in perspective from any other adult is an incredible moment, because it shifts the perspective of “Why are things like this?” to “This is just how things are.” Ask anybody who is in a high level authority in their job about what it was like from being the worker, to being the boss, and I’m sure you’ll find a lot of interesting anecdotes that is relatable to your own life.

So from the loser phase we go into the scrappy underdog part of the story arc. The scrappy underdog part of any rockstar life, plays out the same way: they had a dream that their music would make them be somebody, they started off small playing local venues, got turned down by nearly everybody, then one person took a chance and signed them–and Bam! Success! This resonates with people the same way Joel Olsteen resonates with people. That if they keep doing this or that, then one day they’ll be rich, and they won’t have to worry about paying the bills anymore, or being part of the plebs. Everybody is guilty of it, I am, you are, we all live in fantasy worlds where we’re all secret kings, and then one day we’ll be discovered. It’s the affliction we all suffer from. Yet we’re not going to get the cure from any musician.

Imagine this. Imagine somebody on their deathbed, imagine asking them if they had any regrets in life. I’m guaranteeing you that being a rockstar, isn’t one of them. In fact most people grow out of the secret king fantasy by the time they retire. I mean look at retired people, how many of them do things to be successful? Success to them is seeing their family, seeing their kids grow, and going to some vacation every now and then.

So we went over the loser, scrappy underdog, and success phases; now let’s go over the addict, and sober part of the story. Rockstars, rappers, pop artists, etc. all still go through the hedonistic use of drugs. It doesn’t look like it’s going to stop anytime soon, no matter how much of a stereotype it is, and no matter how often more senior musicians tell people not to do it. Why is that? Well part of it is because pop music is a young man’s game, and young people are more inclined to do drugs. But it’s also because they can. You see most of the time, most adults can’t get a job unless they pass a drug test, and then when they do pass a drug test, they can’t use drugs because if they do they’ll lose said job. People who are hardcore addicts, as the saying goes, “Either die, or end up in jail.” Yet in the music business there’s no piss test you gotta take, you got all the money you want to blow on drugs, so you don’t need to rob people to get a fix. So when they eventually do get sober, and release a song about their struggles with addiction, it’s the end of their new material.

Finally when we get to them doing reunion tours playing old songs, the question has to be asked, “Why aren’t you writing new songs? Why has your musical progression halted? Why are you singing the same old tune?” The answer is, because no matter how deep in addiction they were, no matter how much of a loser they were, they are no longer relatable. Their common ground with us, as a listener, died the moment they got sober. Because if you takeaway the drugs, all they have is a large pile of money, famous friends, the ability to travel the world, and do so much more than you or I could ever do.

This perennial adolescence is also why, as adults, when we get older we kind of listen to the same bands we grew up listening to. The reason they tour isn’t to document their lives, rather it’s for the listener to go down memory lane, back when they were young and the world was filled with endless possibilities. Which is fine and dandy, but imagine if any other artform was just limited to your 20’s-30’s. Imagine the movies, the books, everything was just limited to that 10 year window. Isn’t that a bit shallow? Look at all the great authors Tolstoy, Hemingway, Dostoevsky, Milton, Orwell, etc. imagine all the great novels that wouldn’t exist if they just wrote about pre-fame, fame, and post-fame. Some of their greatest works are about older people!

So let’s look at artists who broke this stereotype. David Bowie, Leonard Cohen, and Johnny Cash. Who made some of their best music when they were old with one foot in the grave. Not only do they write about something we can all eventually relate to–death. But they did so in a way that we could all relate to. Now imagine an artist who doesn’t become famous, who lives the daily struggle that everybody else goes through, and whose perspective remains grounded in the common man. That, my readers, is a far more interesting artist than most popular musicians. And why you shouldn’t gun for fame, but rather, aim your sights to being the best possible musician. Because after all, everything decays: money, clothes, wealth, etc. But what doesn’t decay is art. So make great art, and you’ll be remembered forever.

The Pretenders

Here’s a throwback for ya. Remember that one time that everybody laughed at a 13 year old for being in a music video for her birthday? That was so funny right? “Oh but she’s actually really talented!” Okay… You’re kind of missing the point… “Now she’s a successful musician who has a message to all of her haters!” Jesus Christ…No….

See Rebecca Black is kind of a tragic tale. She was bullied so badly that she had to change schools, and found out that she really loved the musical program. So with her new found therapeutic outlet, her parents paid $4,000 for Ark Studios, made a music video, and hoped that it would jump start her music career. Which it did in a way, though not in the way she expected, and I don’t need to remind everyone about that whole saga.

You see the tragedy wasn’t that she was harassed because she was following her dreams, the tragedy is that she got ripped off by “The Pretenders.” The make-believe producers, the make-believe professionals. I truly believe that at age 13 Rebecca Black could have personally written a better song than Friday. Or better yet imagine if that $4,000 dollars was spent on a guitar, recording equipment, a camera, a DAW–really anything, she could have done a better job. And if not, so what?

“Well it was a bad decision then, but she’s successful now!” How? How is she successful now? Because she was on The Four: Battle for Stardom? She’s literally doing the exact same thing as before, this time instead of being on youtube, she’s on Fox. “Well these are actual professionals! This time it’s not a scam!” Except it is.

So I’m going to remove Rebecca Black from the equation, I truly wish the best for her, and I hope she accomplishes whatever she sets her sights to. I truly do.

But for some reason, a lot musicians have daddy issues.

What I mean by Daddy issues is doing the same histrionic “Notice me Daddy!” dance, and if you’re an adult with daddy issues, it’s not sad, it’s pathetic. I’ve seen so many people try their hands at the entertainment business and they almost always fail. Why? Because nobody attempts to be the adult, nobody attempts to the DIY thing anymore, nobody is taking risks, and nobody has any work ethic.

Do you know how a major label got started? It got started because some guy got tired of listening to the same old bullshit.

Do you want to know how a guy became head of a film studio? Because he got tired of watching the same old bullshit.

Do you know how a music reviewer got started? Because he got tired of reading the same old bullshit.

All of those people are “Pretenders,” no major record label can read minds, if they could read minds there would be more than 5 rock bands on the radio. If they could read minds, their would be a lot more variety of music. But they can’t, they can only go off of data, numbers, instinct, etc. I mean Jesus Christ, these people have twitters, if you think they’re smart just spend an hour reading their tweets.

Yet I guarantee there is going to be someone who reads this and thinks “Well I want to look professional!” Where in the hell has anybody–in all of art history–been professional ever? Van Gogh literally cut his ear off, Jim Morrison would have blowjobs out in the open at parties, Caravaggio literally killed a guy, Michael Jackson was Michael Jackson.

Artists are WEIRD people. I’m weird, you’re weird, we’re all weird. Yet the struggle is where it happens. The struggle is where that weirdness gets chiseled down, into marbled perfection. Where we find out what weirdness works, what weirdness doesn’t, and what weirdness is just too weird.

David Bowie was a mime once, literally a mime. Marylin Manson wrote articles for a magazine. Jim Morrison tried to be a film director. You get the idea. The point is, nobody is going to do it for you. In fact you would have a better chance going to Vegas and hitting it big, than climbing up that imaginary entertainment corporate ladder.  Where somebody sees how “Professional” your music video is, and how the internet music guy said good things about your music.

Don’t be waiting for someone to do it for you, go out and do it. If you fuck up, fuck up fast, and figure out your next move.

If you’re not getting reviews, make a blog.

If you’re not making music videos, make your own.

If you’re not signed to a label, then make your own.

If you can’t find the right beats, make your own.

Take away the power of the “Pretenders” because that’s all they are–at their best. Because let’s be real, we all know about Harvey Weinstein, and how the entertainment business does job interviews. These “Pretenders” are exploiters, and if you don’t take power out of their hands by doing your own thing–then you’re fucked.


The Saddest Sight I’ve ever seen

If you’re an artist remember the idiom, “Putting the cart before the horse.” Now why do I say this? Because time, and time again, I see people acting as though they’re real professional musicians, when they haven’t made a dime from the music they make. I see people, who have less than 5k plays on soundcloud, less than 500 followers on facebook, and 30 followers on twitter sell merchandise for their band…

What the fuck is that? What levels of narcissism are you on bro? Who the fuck is going to buy your t-shirt? YOU LITERALLY PLAY IN COFFEE HOUSES WITH 10 PEOPLE IN IT!!!! What are you going to start calling them your fans, and humblebrag about how grateful you are to them?

Since you wanna make-believe that you’re a business man, let’s look over your make-believe business plan.

  1. Release one EP
  2. ??????????
  3. Sell Merchandise
  4. ????????
  5. Profit

Now there are two ways to look at this post. One you can get angry, “Oh what does this guy know? I have tons of fans, when I make it to the top my T-shirts are going to be valuable collector items.” Or two you can be self conscious, “Oh, I hope I’m not like that.” If you’re in the second category then you don’t need to worry.

This isn’t a post about purity-spiraling in worrying that you are going to be a sellout if you release merchandise. Rather this is a post about focusing on what you are. Are you a musician? Or are you a T-shirt salesman? Because the fact of the matter is, unless you are the greatest frontman the world has ever seen, nobody is going to remember you at a coffee house, or playing a set at a bar. Think about it. Did you ever once think to yourself, “Oh man that guy playing the guitar at the coffee house was really good, I wanna buy a T-shirt with his name on it.”

I get it, making money off of music is hard. Merchandise is another way to pay the bills. But that should be supplemental income, not your bread and butter. In other words, at least have some street cred. If you are trying to shill merchandise after a show, rather than your actual music, then why are you making music?

Just have fun: Lessons from Troll 2


Everybody is guilty of being a snob when it comes to art. After all, Susan Sontag, one of the most important literary theorists of the 21st century said, “Intelligence is really a kind of … taste in ideas.”

So when an artist puts out music that they’ve poured hours into working on, only for it to be treated with contempt is absolutely devastating.  It’s an attack that hurts you as a person, that invalidates your intelligence, emotions, identity, nearly everything that compromises of who you are. It’s the worst kind of pain to feel–a pain that degrades you.

Then there is Troll 2, one of the worst movies of all time, with some of the worst dialogue, acting, directing, special effects, etc. It’s almost impossible to create a worse movie than this. Yet…none of the actors are particularly depressed at making such a bad film. In fact they think it’s kind of cool to make one of the worst movies of all time.

Take Dr. Hardy a dentist by trade who decided to act in this film (he’s the dad who tightens his belt in the video above talking about hunger pain for some reason.) Now the guy could have aspired to be the next Marlon Brando, he could have better taste in movies than anybody you, or I know. Yet he’s a dentist, and he auditioned for the role as a spur of the moment thing to do because a patient suggested he do so.

So watching this interview, first thing to notice at 5:19 when he talks about watching the film, the cringe he has at recalling the movie. Something that every single artist has when they look back at earlier work. Now every single person making art imagines themselves–at one point in time–making the next big thing, only for it to end in utter disappointment. Imagine getting THE LEAD PART in a movie. I don’t care what it is, those fantasies of being the next Hollywood Superstar is going to be floating in your head. So when those fantasies turn out not only to be false, but to be completely misguided and completely wrong–it’s going to be a rough emotional rollercoaster to ride.

So when Troll 2 is declared the worst movie of all time, how does George Hardy react? With a smile. He’s glad he was apart of something (even if it was terrible) that people enjoyed to watch.

Time heals all wounds. If you don’t make it now, or you just continue to make music eventually you’ll get better, and if not who cares? Seriously. Unless you’re a Chris Chan nobody is going to care whether your art is subpar. And if you make great music that nobody has heard of, because you haven’t gotten your big break, imagine your reaction in 20 years. If George Hardy can smile at making the worst movie of all time, then surely you’ll do more than smile.

The moral of the story is, don’t beat yourself up at being an underground artist, who hasn’t made it to the mainstream. Being in the underground is cooler anyways, we’re like rebel insurgents against an evil Corporate Empire of mediocrity. Even the indie network of blogs, radio shows, promotional events, labels, etc. have proven themselves to be dishonest con artists–which every underground musician has had experience with–imagine how much worse it is at top.

So with that I say, just have fun. You’ve got nothing to lose, and all to gain. Even if you waste some money, or spend years grinding away only to get nothing in return; at least you’ll be interesting. I mean I’ve seen alcoholics, and drug addicts bounce back (unless you’re a drug addict/alcoholic making music in which case I gotta say, “What the fuck man haven’t you watched any VH1 Behind the Music specials?”) So remember kids just have fun, fuck the haters, and don’t beat yourself up if you don’t make it.

Cherry Pickers: The State of Music Blogs


Music bloggers are first and foremost journalists; journalists by definition follow the lead. They want to be the ones who say that they were the first to find the big next thing. Except they really don’t know how to. They say in the soundcloud/bandcamp communities that when you get big, you won’t have to reach out to journalists, they’ll be coming to you. Which is kind of nonsense when you think about it. Are bloggers such insecure people that they can only write about music once it’s been pre-approved by some arbitrary amount of fans? Even if they turn out to be nobodies, at least you showed some of your readers some new talent, that you liked.

Yet no motive exists in a vacuum. “No Man is an Island,” every music magazine, journal, website, and blog has its bias which affects artist and reader alike. Sadly, that bias extends in every part of the music journalism sphere. Take for example Pitchfork, or Bandcamp. When they’re not jumping on the bandwagon, they try to find the most obscure sound, in the most obscure location, with the person with the most obscure identification (whether it be race/nationality/gender/sexual orientation/etc.) as though that accounts for good taste.

I get it, artists are a weird bunch. We all come in all different shapes and sizes. Yet what the music blogging community does isn’t so much being an advocate for these groups, far from it. They use these artists as a proxy; that instead of actually developing taste, or being confident in their own opinions. The parade the obscure; in hope that they get enough brownie points within their own little cliques.

Another problem is the millennial group-think mentality that’s infiltrated through journalism. While Gen X was Bart Simpson; Millenials are Lisa Simpson. They are the “Teacher is always right,” kind of people. While Bart was fighting against the system, Lisa upholds the system. Millennials, in general, don’t do the DIY thing like Gen X did. If and when they do, it’s usually to build a large enough portfolio to join an already pre-established organization that was already made by a DIY Gen X’er. Because at heart these journalists are the goody-goodies who got good grades at school, went to college, had a wacky “experimentation phase,” got a job in the field they wanted to, and now review artists that have established a large enough fan base. Or they just ride on the coattails of their baby boomer parents, and get established through nepotism–regardless it’s still the same.

Yet people want to get their music reviews from these people? Fuck that. I went to college only to get a job I can’t stand. How many others are like me? Are you working at your dream job? Are you living the dream? Probably not.

So when I read an article from these people–who are supposed to be reviewing music–go on about politics, it makes me gag. The Last Psychiatrist had an excellent article about politics and music. If you haven’t had the chance. Read it. Come back. Then read the rest of this article. But on to my point, the Lisa Simpsons of music bloggers relentlessly write on and on and on about politics to the point where music is just politics through other means. But does that really help the artist? What if Jimbobjoe could really love this underground Cambodian Hip Hop trio, but instead he’s getting a lecture on colonialism, and a reference to Hip Hop every now and then. Also let’s say the opposite, let’s say that Sarah hates with a passion hip hop music, but is really concerned about the LGBTQ+ community, and a new act came out that really shines a light on LGBTQ+ issues; is she going to start liking the music just because they have the same politics has her? Not likely.

Finally let’s get to the scam artists. The people, who are the biggest pieces of shit. Who demand money for a review, or who post constantly on twitter about being featured only to write a feature on a musician once or twice a week. These people as mentioned before, are the portfolio builders, scam artists. You gamble with your money, only to get no more additional views, additional fans, or anything. While they ride off with your money.

Here it’s different. We review and catalog actual underground artists who are truly hidden gems, and we have a catalog of musicians trying to make it. There is no politics, we don’t have any false pretensions, and we aren’t scam artists. We do what we say, and say what we do. If you don’t believe us, well read our reviews, listen to the music, and tell us that we’re the same as other music bloggers. I know that by the end, you’ll see we’re the real deal.


On Music Bloggers



So anybody who has been in the music scene, who has been slaving away trying to “Make it” has gotten the same advice. Which is to get featured on a blog. An economy which is by nature a ponzi scheme.

Bloggers for some reason believe that they are holier than thou, they demand that you should pay $40 dollars for a chance to be promoted. They shill tweet after tweet saying that “If you just repost and comment your music you’ll be featured on our blog” a promise which always turns out to be bullshit.

Months pass by, you see two or three musicians featured with 10k-30k followers, all bypassing any promising underground talent–that could be the next David Bowie–based on the arbitrary amount of followers they have on soundcloud.

This desire to make it with the self appointed “taste-makers,” creates this incestuous dichotomy in which the music they approve creates a scene. People see that that scene gives people popularity and then everybody gets into this rat race to the lowest common denominator. Nobody pushes any new boundaries, sets up new genres, or whatever. Everything becomes stale, tiresome, and boring. Then everybody wonders why modern music (and even “indie” music) just sounds so bland.

So I have an easy solution to both find new music that pushes boundaries, that says something different–that is unique and beautiful–and that is if you say you’re a fucking blogger. Then blog.

After all the time and effort it takes a musician to make a song, the least thing you could do is at least review a few musicians. But alas bloggers are delicate narcissists whose fingers can’t type on a keyboard too long and the work is just oh so difficult.

So since I have a work ethic, and so do other people on this blog. WE WILL REVIEW your music, and we will give artists the platform to VOICE THEIR OPINIONS.

Because everybody knows at the end of the day, those who cannot do, can always blog.